Appearances and Realities

     They walk in, line up, take their place amongst the others. I look at their faces, wondering what has led them to this place. What series of events have been strung together in their lives to lead them to the doors of St. John’s Kitchen? Did they lose their house or job? Do they suffer from addictions they cannot manage? Or did something else happen to them? Their struggles are written all over their weather beaten faces, yet their faces are not as grim as one would expect. They grab their trays and their plates and patiently make their way down to get food. Every mouth opens with a “yes please, thank you”. Maybe what their faces illuminated for me was a sense of humility and gentleness, an image that their bodies did not likewise express. One man even jokes, “I will not die today” to the staff and volunteers. This lightly spoken line is one that rings through my mind like a gong waking me from a daze. The humorous manner in which it is spoken does not lighten the harsh reality of what is said. The irony is that they are in a constant battle with death. Daily they fight to put food in their bellies, and to hide from the harsh winter winds that threaten their health and well being. Yet they did not project their negative circumstances into negative energy on those who were behind the counter serving them. We are the outsiders after all. They looked not with judgment or anger, but with gratitude. That is one thing I did not expect.
    My first impression of St. John’s Kitchen: Ummm? I was a little taken aback when I first met the coordinator, let us call her ‘Aesthetics’. She was not expecting me, and was wondering why I was there and why she had no knowledge of my placement. I was intimidated by her at first, but then when “Pink Panther” showed up, and she began to joke saying, “oooww he’s cuteee, look at his arm muscles and pecks. Men are aesthetically pleasing for me” I could not help but laugh and loosen my opinion of her.
    When I finally got my sexy hairnet and apron on I felt quite lost because everyone was running around and I had no clue what to do or where to start! With a little help from ‘J-dawg’, another volunteer, I slowly took to action. I swept, prepared food, and served. It was an interesting first soup kitchen experience, and three hours well spent! I am looking forward to going back and seeing how things change over the course of the term.