Learn to Say Nkwagala

    All it takes is one word to engulf nations; one word to transcend the barriers of time and space. It is something universal, fundamental. Humans yearn to capture it, like children chasing fireflies-- with open jars and outstretched arms. They are mesmerized by that spark, projected from some mysterious inner source. A flicker of light, against a world shrouded in darkness. What they desire most is to feel that light flicker within themselves; a light to eliminate the encapsulating darkness they experience in their inner world. For some this word is nothing but a hallmark term; overused and oversold. For others it is one of joy, sustenance, and survival. This word simply put, is love.   
    Love is exactly what I witnessed today as I spent my Valentine’s Day afternoon volunteering at St. John’s Kitchen. Not even five minutes passed before a stranger came up to me-- all smiles-- as I was wiping down a table, and wished me a “Happy Valentine’s Day”. It was phenomenal to witness the power of that sentiment, alive in a place like a soup kitchen. This man did not know me, I have never met him; he is a visitor, I, a volunteer; but the exchange between us was not one of cynicism about a holiday known for its consumerism, the exchange was something deeper, more in-tune with a spirit of friendship that the holiday is meant to portray.
    The spirit of this day did not end there, for as I went around cleaning tables, a man I see regularly-- let us call him ‘Bob’-- sparked a conversation with me. Generally I would have simply answered with a one or two word response, but being there made me think about my purpose at St. John’s: it was to learn from people. So I asked him about his hobbies and interests (crafts, biking, reading), asked him about where he came from (Toronto), and learned his perspective on the world he lives in. What I learned is that Bob likes Kitchener because compared to Toronto, it is less polluted and less condensed with people and traffic. He also mentioned that in times when coming to a soup kitchen was necessary, the food in the Toronto soup kitchens was bland and not as nourishing as it is at St. John’s. It was so interesting to hear this perspective straight from his lips because when Joe and Rebbecca mentioned St. John’s as a nurturing community, it seemed more like their words spoke from a place where they wished it to be so. What I found even more astounding, was that this man, out of nowhere, produced a necklace for me to have. To have little, and to give regardless, that is truly the meaning of the word love.
    Aesthetics also sparked an interesting thought in me about the nature of Valentine’s Day. She told me a story about her dearest friend who died recently, and after her death she became really close with her friends children. So close in fact that the son asked her if she would be his sister. Then this morning, Aesthetics received a text from him asking if she would consider it incestuous if he asked her to be his valentine. Curious, she asked other volunteers what they thought, and all came to the conclusion that yes, it would be considered incestuous. After some thought, she disregarded their opinions. We think about Valentine’s Day as a day to celebrate the love between couples, but often forget about the love between those who have come together in another way. They are bonded not in consummate love, but in a mutual love for a person that passed, a person that in death, brought them together.
    With Valentine’s Day on my mind, I was curious about the Ugandan view on this day, and whether or not they celebrate it as we do. Robert Jamieson from the Seattle Post-Intelligencer, pointed out that Kampala, the capital city of Uganda, comes alive and is transformed “into a giddy sea of red and black” (the traditional Valentine’s Day colours warn in celebration) on this day. Many say that the hype was brought over by American tourists and adopted by the younger generation of Ugandan people over the years. However, many older individuals criticize the craze that is associated with this day, considering it a “strange foreign habit”, one that “is a brief, giddy, respite from life that can be punishing here”. This shows an interesting perspective, that Valentine’s Day is ornamental and enchanting, yet it is a temporary euphoria against the problems that the country faces on a day-to-day basis, problems like war and HIV/AIDS.
    While I cannot argue against these opinions, I think a little enchantment is not a bad thing. Everyone needs escape once in a while, everyone needs to feel loved. Love has the power to transform, all we need to do is let it.